How to be a bit more charming? Some people could easily gain the trust of everyone and create a positive image of themselves? Jeff Haden, one of the most influential people on LinkedIn and the author of almost 30 business and communication books, explained how they do it.
It turns out they know some simple secrets, and today you have a chance to discover them all… Have you ever noticed, for example, that such people are not afraid to look silly? They’re not afraid to be awkward. Curiously enough, people respect them even more because of this. If you’re not shy to show your weaknesses, people won’t laugh at you! So, guys, here’re 9 essential characteristics that make any person look more confident and charming:
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00:52 — They’re not afraid to lose
01:28 — They show they’re glad to meet you
02:09 — They look for mutual understanding
02:47 — They use the power of touch
03:41 — They know how to use facial expressions and gestures
04:19 — They’re not afraid to look silly
04:54 — They’re good at asking questions
05:38 — They always remember names
06:27 — They listen more and talk less
- #9 – NOT AFRAID TO LOSE
Charming people don’t try to win at everything. On the contrary, their aim is to give more without expecting anything in return. For them, it’s not difficult to admit their mistakes, failures, or talk about their weaknesses. And it’s something that not everyone can do… They can openly say “I’m jealous of you”, or “I can’t do that, show me how” because they know people appreciate honesty and real emotions.
- #8 – GLAD TO MEET YOU
Maintaining eye contact is important in a conversation and people who have Charisma know this for sure. They smile when you smile, they frown or not when you do. However, they don’t just try to repeat everything after you: they are focused on what you’re saying and listen to you carefully, paying attention to all your emotions and words… Such feedback helps you find common ground with anyone and gain the trust of the person you’re interacting with!
- #7 – MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING
Most people unconsciously look for contradictions and disagreements, which can lead to a dispute rather than a conversation… Charismatic people always seek common ground with everybody. So, to become more attractive to others, just try to find something in common with them! This trick will help you start an interesting conversation and create a positive impression.
- #6 – THE POWER OF TOUCH
Touch is a powerful tool that helps people understand their emotions better. In a recent experiment, scientists tried to express 12 emotions by touching their interlocutors without words: in 50% to 83% of the cases these feelings were expressed correctly… Therefore, when you want to congratulate someone, first think about how you could do it better. Expressing your feelings depends on the situation: you could either shake hands or pat someone on the back. This will help you show how sincere your words are, express the right feelings and gain the trust of others!
- #5 – FACIAL EXPRESSIONS and GESTURES
Charming people express their feelings incredibly well and accurately. They can turn even the most boring story into an enthralling conversation. By gesturing and using expressive faces (when it’s appropriate, of course), they show the right mood for their stories… This trick will help you genuinely kindle the interest of other people.
- #4 – NOT AFRAID TO LOOK SILLY
Maybe ice skating or Twister is not their strong point, but they’re not afraid to be awkward… Curiously enough, people respect them even more because of this! If you’re not shy to show your weaknesses and not afraid to look silly, people won’t laugh at you: they laugh with you… Everybody understands that. All of this is fine. We all make mistakes.
- #3 – GOOD AT ASKING QUESTIONS
Charming people can make you talk about yourself easily. They don’t hesitate to ask questions and talk openly about themselves as well… These people genuinely want to know what you’re thinking and this makes them trustworthy. As soon as you find out something about a person, just ask them more questions and tell them some similar things about yourself. They will understand you have something in common and that might be an interesting topic for conversation!
- #2 – ALWAYS REMEMBER NAMES
Charismatic people always remember names (and other small details about others) very accurately. When someone remembers your name, when you’ve known each other for a short while, or when you’ve only met once, it makes you feel more important in the conversation… Call the person by name and remember the names of their friends, relatives, and even their pets, it’s one of the easiest ways to make the person think only positively of you.
- #1 – LISTEN MORE and TALK LESS
Most people can’t listen at all, but they love talking about themselves. Everybody wants to share their own news. However, let’s admit it’s a nice feeling when you tell a story and notice everyone is listening to you carefully and reacting emotionally… Charming people know how to listen and they love listening more than talking. That’s how they learn more interesting details about a person and find something in common… So, the next time you’re talking with someone, try to listen to their problems and understand their needs. If you manage to really do so, they will never forget you!